SUSAN, COME BACK TO ME
Part 1: STANLEY KNOCKING
Susan was with the kids. She was helping Eniola with his assignment while Lucy slept on the couch beside her. Eniola was three years old while Lucy was barely a year old. Her oldest child, Samuel is by himself doing his assignment.
Bolu their father and husband to Susan wasn’t at home. He will be back home by 9:30pm and sometimes after 10:00pm. Bolu works as a Federal Government worker. He closes by 4:00pm but he will never make it home until late in the night. He is “omojayejaye” which means a guy who frolicks in utter pleasure and without restraints.
From office he drives downtown to club houses to have pleasure. He knows where the best club houses are situated around town. Palongo Love World and Entrall Club House are his favourite. On some certain occasions he fails to come back home as he finds a hotel or guest house to sleep in till morning in company of girls of all kinds.
Bolu doesn’t have taste. He goes for anything in skirt. When he fails to get one, he knows the prostitute houses around and where to find a girl for himself. This is Susan’s husband.
He is an absentee husband. Susan had come to term with her big cross and she had mastered it so well that she’s an envy to many. There’s no mountain too high to cross when the will is made. Susan had made up her mind to enjoy life and to make the best of it in spite of Bolu’s reckless lifestyle.
Susan is a fast learner. It wasn’t difficult to adjust into her new reality of an absentee husband. She became everything in the marriage without complaining or murmuring. She lives her life as if he was never there.
She bears virtually all the responsibility of the home. She pays the children school fee and offers them all needed supports. What do you want her to do? In many instances, he comes home complaining of having no money. This he does after acting prodigiously with his income living riotously with his earnings. He seem to be brother to the biblical Prodigal Son; they bear much resemblance. The only difference is that Bolu lives in the 21st Century.
Susan was not that strong to deal with challenges. She was made strong by adversity as she had come to learn that what doesn’t break us make us strong. Strong winds help make the bough tough.
Much thanks also to her mom, Mrs Beatrice. Her role made it evident that younger couples should as much as possible have mentors; trustworthy person they can look up to in moments of crises or when they need answers to issues of life. Susan had her mom as her confidant and mentor.
She remembered how she was ready to run out of the marriage after three months. Then she was two months pregnant with Samuel who is presently six years old.
“No marriage is cheap my daughter. Stay in. Marriage is not for boys and girls. Those who have a marriage own such because they have determination to hold on. At certain point, everyone would feel like moving out of a marriage. Yet with little faith as a mustard seed and much perseverance we would always find reasons to move on.”
“Mom!” Susan exclaimed with tears dripping down her face. “You don’t know Bolu, he’s a devil.”
“Susan my daughter,” Mrs Beatrice smiled. “Bolu is everything you don’t want in a man, that I understand. Deep within you he is an accident that happened to you.”
“Yes mom.”
“Do you know how I feel also my daughter?”
“How?”
“I feel like having you move out of his life. I feel like having him cast into the hottest part of hell for making my Susan sad and sorrowful.” Susan’s mother too began to weep. “Susan, you are too good to have that devil as your husband – this is not because you’re my daughter. You’re a daughter of blessed heart of an angel.
“I feel like cursing Bolu and if I have the power make him rot in jail. But I’ll not do that, he has become my son in-law.” Her mom could see some visible mark of his brutality on Susan’s left cheek.
“Mother! I thought you never cared for my feelings.” She moved towards her mom and have her tears wiped off.
“My daughter, I know how you feel. But you cannot quit now. You’re a Christian and you’re an eagle. The eagle soar in the storm. We thrive in adversity. When others are saying there’s a casting down, we shall say we are lifted. You cannot quit until you have a trophy for your adversity.”
“Okay mom.”
“Change the outlooks from suffering to opportunity to learn. Feast on the adversity, crumble the betrayer, melt the wife beater in Bolu. Become a strong mother and come forth an example to women. Don’t retreat as the victim, the seed of a giant is in you. You’re Susan.
“Ma.”
“Much is expected of you. Don’t betray the betrayer. Don’t seek an eye for an eye, you’re the daughter of divine heritage leveraging on peculiar culture of chastity and purity. You cannot do what Bolu is doing. You’re not of the same stuff. Vengeance is of the Lord.”
“What do I do mom?”
“Stay in and turn the relationship to the glory of the Lord; turn the adversity for growth and meaningful life.”
“I’ll mom, though I’m scared.”
“Life itself is a risk but when we do it with intention we end up enlarging what is possible for us and the world. Though scared, walk on until you win.”
Susan was able to faithfully stay in the caustic relationship because she believed her mentor (her mom) more than the challenges in her matrimony.
Over six years now, Susan has become the fulfilment of her mom’s words. By looking to God prayerfully she was able to move ahead. Susan doubled up to make herself financially independent as she moved from being an employee in a private secondary school to owning her own school. This was catalyzed by the need to enlarge her income to cater for the family need. Within six years she became a proprietor of a thriving educational outfit.
In her church she became the head of the youth church. Many young people look up to her as their mentor in church. In addition to this, she runs a youth ministry with a monthly event. She has become very popular. Susan is beginning to achieve a kind of celebrity status.
She didn’t allow her family challenge become her burial ground. Through her mom’s support she learnt how many people get stucked the rest of their lives because of the odious adversities that come their way. Instead she turned the adversities to stepping stones.
In recent time, Bolu began to envy her beautiful life. He on the other hand is becoming miserable as he becomes addicted to drug, alcohol and women. He is in bondage and this he knows.
“Mom, I’m tired.” Eniola woke her mom from her deep thought.
“Shhh,” she hushed him. “Eniola, don’t be lazy like somebody.”
“Mom, who is that somebody?”
“Come off that. You love gossip but you don’t want to do your school work.” She pulled him closer. “Now let’s continue.”
She held him down as they continue his homework from school.
She was about rounding off when she heard knocks. She opened the door and met her gateman.
“What do you want?”
“Somebody wants to see you.”
“Who?”
“He said I should tell you Stanley William.”
“Stanley, Stanley, Stanley?” She kept saying as she walked along with the gateman to the gate.
She told the gateman to stay away as she opened the gate.
“Susan.”
“Stanley, what do you want?”
“Forgive me!” Then he began to plead. Susan also thinking of all Stanley began to cry. She thought that if Stanley had stood with her, she wouldn’t be entangled with Bolu.
“Stanley, I have forgiven you but I have moved on.”
“Susan, I want you.”
“After three kids?”
“It doesn’t matter. I’m ready to take over all the responsibilities. Susan, we are made for each other.”
“Stanley, hear yourself out. We are made for each other yet you left me.”
“I cannot watch our lives continue in mismatched relationships eternally. I knew you are not fulfilled in your marriage too. Mine too is hell. Now that we know better, we can renegotiate our joy. Let us correct the mistakes of the past.”
“Do you include the joy of Joyce and Daniel your children in your new plans?” Susan asked and it got Stanley thinking for a while. “My mom used to say: marriage is beyond the couple. Stanley, let’s move on. Taking too long on the rear mirror will often lead to fatal accident. We have been served lemons, let’s make lemonade out of them.” She smiled. “Let me go in, my son is waiting for me.
“Susan, life is hell with Kate. Please allow me back into your life.”
“I’m sorry please.” Susan gently locked the gate, rested her back on the gate on the inside for a while and later went back into the house. While in she began to weep.
Samuel and Eniola came to their mom.
“Mom, who beat you?” Eniola asked disturbed.
“Mom, who came around and what did he do to you?” Samuel asked.
“Children, it was somebody who reminded me of the past. Let’s forget the past my children.” She wiped her tears and pulled her children closer. “Children, nothing can stop us from having the best of life together. Don’t you think so?”
“Yes.” The children chorused.
Stanley sat beside the gate for a while. Then he left with bitterness.
