WORLD CHANGERS NETWORK

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  • When You Are Ready to Make Your Marriage to Work

    When You Are Ready to Make Your Marriage to Work

    WHEN YOU ARE SINCERELY READY

    Issues You Should Address to End Crises in Your Marriage

    Many marriages are merely a cohabitation den of strange bedfellows

    If you sincerely want to end crises in your marriage, you must look into the following:

    1. Harboring Offense: Holding onto offenses can become toxic in a marriage. When one or both partners carry grudges or unresolved issues, it leads to resentment, communication breakdown, and emotional distance. It’s essential to address conflicts openly and honestly, striving for forgiveness and understanding to prevent the accumulation of grievances that can poison the relationship.
    2. Difficulty in Overlooking Issues: Every relationship faces challenges, but not all issues need to be escalated or dwelled upon. Knowing how to distinguish between minor irritations and significant concerns is crucial. Learning to let go of minor disagreements or annoyances, without letting them escalate into major conflicts, helps maintain harmony in a marriage.
    3. Inability to De-escalate Quarrels: Arguments are inevitable in any relationship, but it’s vital to know how to de-escalate them. Healthy communication involves learning to take breaks when emotions run high, practicing active listening, and using non-confrontational language. Understanding each other’s triggers and actively working to calm a heated situation prevents quarrels from spiraling out of control.
    4. Don’t deny each other sex: when your sex life break down many areas of your life too will fall apart.
    5. Demanding an Eye for an Eye: Seeking retaliation or trying to “get even” during conflicts only perpetuates a cycle of negativity and hurt. Instead, fostering an environment of understanding, empathy, and forgiveness breaks this cycle. Choosing reconciliation and seeking resolution rather than revenge helps rebuild trust and connection.
    6. Building Walls of Separation: Emotional walls between partners can form due to unresolved issues, lack of communication, or emotional distancing. These walls hinder intimacy and understanding. To overcome this, couples must strive to create a safe and open environment where both partners feel comfortable expressing their thoughts, emotions, and vulnerabilities without fear of judgment or rejection.
    7. Having Nothing in Common: Over time, interests, and priorities may evolve, potentially leading to partners feeling they have little in common. However, actively seeking new shared experiences, exploring each other’s interests, and finding common ground fosters a sense of togetherness and helps strengthen the bond between partners.
    8. Not Sharing Joy, Pains, Money, sex etc.: A lack of sharing in a marriage can create a sense of isolation and detachment. Partners should aim to share not only the joys and sorrows of life but also financial responsibilities, dreams, goals, and responsibilities. Open and honest communication about these aspects helps build trust and unity.
    9. Wishing Your Spouse to Fail: In a healthy marriage, both partners should want each other to succeed and thrive. Wishing ill upon one’s spouse indicates deeper issues like resentment or unresolved conflicts. It’s crucial to address these feelings through open dialogue or seek professional help to rebuild a supportive and encouraging partnership.

    Addressing these points by fostering communication, understanding, empathy, and a willingness to work together allows couples to overcome crises, fostering a stronger, more resilient marriage based on mutual respect and love.

  • Simple Tool for Dealing With Depression

    Simple Tool for Dealing With Depression

    Prayer and the Word of God stand as the most potent remedies for the weary soul. Consider these spiritual tools as intentional prescriptions that bring solace and inner peace beyond compare.

    Prayer:

    Prayer is the channel that connects our hearts to the divine. It’s the conversation we have with God, pouring out our concerns, expressing gratitude, seeking guidance, and finding strength in times of distress. In Matthew 6:6, Jesus instructs us to pray in private, where our Father, who sees in secret, will reward us openly. This intimate communion with the Almighty grants us peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:6-7), calming the storm within us and bringing a sense of tranquility even amidst chaos.

    The Word of God:

    The Bible serves as a reservoir of comfort, wisdom, and guidance. In Hebrews 4:12, it’s described as living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and spirit. Through scriptures, we find narratives of courage, endurance, and hope exemplified by numerous individuals, providing us with profound examples of triumph amidst adversity. For instance, David’s faith and reliance on God in Psalm 23:4 (“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me…”) showcases the solace derived from trusting in God’s presence.

    Example:

    Imagine someone facing deep-seated anxiety about an uncertain future. Through prayer, they lay their worries before God, expressing their fears, uncertainties, and desires for guidance. They find solace in this conversation, experiencing a sense of assurance that God is in control. Additionally, they turn to scriptures like Isaiah 41:10 (“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”) for reassurance, finding strength and courage in God’s promises.

    When combined, prayer and the Word form a formidable force, inviting the divine presence to dwell within us. This divine presence dispels darkness, uncertainty, and anxiety, ushering in a peace that transcends all human understanding.

  • A Shift in Your Understanding of Full-Time Ministry

    Introduction: Rethinking Full-Time Ministry

    Many individuals claim to be engaged in full-time ministry, but upon closer examination, it becomes evident that they are not living up to their full potential. Often, the label of full-time ministry is used as an excuse for indolence and laziness. However, it is essential to understand the true meaning of full-time ministry and how it extends beyond traditional perceptions.

    Meeting Needs as Good Stewards

    A true man of God recognizes the importance of accountability and must address needs as they arise. Every hour and day should be purposefully utilized, ensuring that time is not wasted. Engaging in full-time ministry does not involve aimlessly chatting or loitering but rather being a faithful steward of God’s gifts.

    Beyond the Pulpit: A Life Dedicated to God

    If there were such a thing as full-time ministry, it would encompass a life wholly dedicated to the cause of God. It extends beyond the confines of the pulpit and involves living out the teachings of Christ in every aspect of life. Notable figures like Joseph, Daniel, Mother Teresa of Calcutta, Mary Slessor, and David Livingstone exemplify true ministry through their contributions to society.

    Being People of Many Parts

    Successful ministers often demonstrate versatility and engage in various areas of societal need. These exemplary individuals branch out into sectors such as education, health, leadership development, and more. By addressing diverse societal problems, they exhibit the transformative power of ministry in different realms.

    A Paradigm Shift in Understanding

    It is crucial to shift our understanding of full-time ministry. Every act performed in the name of the Lord and for His glory is ministry. A preacher seeking paid employment to support their family is not failing but rather fulfilling their responsibilities. However, when the demands of ministry overwhelm their time, the ministry should be able to provide for their needs.

    Augmenting Finances and Responsible Stewardship

    In situations where the ministry has limited resources or a small number of members, ministers must be creative in augmenting their finances. Just as Paul recognized the need to work and support himself, ministers can seek additional means of financial support without neglecting their ministry. A balance between ministry, family, personal development, and other responsibilities is necessary.

    Making the Best Use of Time

    Within a 24-hour day, there are various areas of focus, including family, work, relationships, personal development, entertainment, and ministry. A man of God must allocate time to each area, ensuring that every moment is valuable and impactful. Wasting time is contrary to the principles of responsible stewardship, and God detests such wastefulness.

    Avoiding Waste and Embracing Purpose

    Jesus’s instruction to avoid waste, as seen in the multiplication of bread and fish, teaches us to make the most of our resources. The parable of the man with one talent emphasizes the importance of using one’s abilities wisely rather than burying them. It is crucial to embrace purpose in our daily lives, utilizing time effectively and dedicating every action to the glory of the Lord.

    Conclusion: An Acceptable Sacrifice

    By reevaluating our understanding of full-time ministry, we can align our lives with the principles of responsible stewardship and purposeful living. Each day presents an opportunity to make the best use of our time and ensure that everything we do brings glory to the Lord. When our ministry becomes an acceptable sacrifice, we can serve God wholeheartedly and impact the world around us.

  • Finding Favour and Blessings

    Becoming the “Certain Man”: Finding Favor and Blessings

    Introduction

    During my recent Bible reading, I came across an intriguing story in the Book of John, Chapter 5, about an invalid man by the pool of Bethesda. This particular individual caught my attention because the Bible referred to him as a “certain man.” Despite the presence of many others with diverse challenges, Jesus Christ approached and ministered to this specific man. This revelation led me to contemplate the multitude of individuals in life who face various hardships, often remaining trapped in their pain and sorrow. However, there is hope for every person to find grace, mercy, prosperity, and deliverance. In this article, I invite you to become that “certain man” who attracts the love and favor of Christ.

    Attracting God’s Favor

    God does not dispense favor haphazardly; there is always an underlying attraction. In the case of the certain man by the pool, there must have been something that drew Jesus to him. Reflecting on this, let us pray that the Lord enables us to become attractive vessels of His love and favor. We should seek to cultivate a deep relationship with God, aligning our hearts with His purposes and living in obedience to His Word. Through prayer and a genuine pursuit of God’s presence, we position ourselves to receive His abundant blessings.

    Prayer for Abundance and Breakthrough

    Let us pray: “May I be the certain man for the next line of prosperity, promotion, abundance, healing, and help.” As we aspire to become the “certain man” in our own lives, we should hunger for the miraculous, the supernatural, and the divine assistance that only God can provide. Just as Joseph stood out among his brothers, David was anointed as king, and the widow of Zarephath received divine provision, let our hearts long for the extraordinary intervention of God. By fervently seeking His face, we position ourselves to be recipients of fresh help and favor.

    Learning from Biblical Examples

    Throughout the Bible, we encounter numerous individuals who were singled out in crowded places, finding themselves divinely appointed for extraordinary purposes. Consider Mary, the mother of Jesus Christ, chosen to bring forth the Savior of the world. These individuals did not achieve this distinction by their own merits but rather by being open to God’s leading and surrendered to His will. Let us, too, earnestly desire to be instruments in the hands of God, ready to be used for His glory.

    Conclusion

    In a world where many people suffer silently in their trials, let us rise above the ordinary and become the “certain man” who attracts the attention of Jesus Christ. Through prayer, seeking God’s presence, and aligning our lives with His Word, we position ourselves to receive abundant blessings, favor, and breakthrough. Just as God showed His love and favor to specific individuals in the Bible, we can become vessels through which He pours out His goodness in our lives. May you be known as that “certain person” who receives fresh help, favor, and miraculous interventions from the Lord.

  • What Love Experts Don’t Tell You – 4

    IT IS YOUR WORK TO MAKE THINGS WORK

    If you are not happy being single or unmarried, it is important to question why you believe that marriage will bring you joy. The truth is, who you are as an individual will only be amplified by marriage.

    Proverbs 27:19 KJV
    As in water face answereth to face, so the heart of man to man.

    If you do not know how to cohabit and build a strong foundation before entering into marriage, the act of getting married itself will not fundamentally change you. As Mahatma Gandhi once wisely said, “Be the change you want to see in others.” The key to a secure and blissful marriage lies in the effort and commitment you put into it. Never rely solely on your partner to be responsible for your happiness, fulfillment, wealth, and prosperity. You are a significant stakeholder in your own joy and personal growth, both before and after marriage.

    If you are struggling with financial difficulties, it is unrealistic to expect that marriage will magically solve all your problems and bring you riches. This belief is an illusion. If you are unable to contribute to the financial stability and well-being of your family, you will likely become a burden rather than a valuable asset. Your desire for an easy life without taking on responsibilities will only lead to disdain and animosity from your partner and others around you.

    This is why relationships often face challenges when there is a significant difference in status between partners. One partner may be focused on personal growth, building wealth, and developing skills, while the other may view the marriage as an opportunity to exploit the fortune of their partner.

    In essence, the level of investment you put into a marriage significantly determines the level of bliss and fulfillment you can expect to receive from it. It is crucial to understand that to find true happiness in a marriage, we must take responsibility for our actions and contributions. We must strive to become partners who actively contribute to the growth and well-being of the entire family. A marriage that brings blessings and abundance is one that is nurtured and cultivated, allowing the best qualities of both individuals to flourish and benefit the union.

  • What Love Experts Don’t Tell You – 3

    PERSONAL GROWTH LEADS TO MARITAL BLISS

    GUARANTEE FOR A BLISSFUL MARRIAGE

    Consider these wise sayings:

    1. “A lizard in Nigeria will not suddenly grow into an alligator in America.” This adage emphasizes that one’s environment or circumstances cannot dramatically transform their inherent nature or identity. Similarly, marriage cannot magically become blissful without the active participation and efforts of both partners.
    2. The quality of a marriage is a reflection of the individuals involved. The type of people who choose to be united in matrimony will greatly influence the overall dynamics and satisfaction within the relationship. Therefore, it is essential to carefully consider the character, values, and compatibility of a potential spouse before committing to marriage.
    3. A blissful marriage cannot be sustained by a person lacking manners and decorum. Respect, kindness, and consideration are crucial ingredients for a harmonious marital relationship. Similarly, someone with immoral and corrupt tendencies will struggle to appreciate and cultivate true happiness within the context of marriage.
    4. An individual plagued by anger and a volatile temper will only long for a happy home without taking the necessary steps to achieve it. It is important to acknowledge that a blissful marriage is incompatible with someone who consistently exhibits anger and a lack of emotional control.
    5. Proverbs 21:19 in the King James Version of the Bible states, “It is better to dwell in the wilderness than with a contentious and angry woman.” This biblical verse cautions against being in a relationship with a woman who constantly engages in arguments and displays anger. The principle also applies to men who exhibit similar behaviours.
    6. Take Satan to Paradise, and he will transform it into hell. This saying emphasizes that an individual’s negative qualities and destructive tendencies can profoundly impact even the most favourable and pleasant circumstances. In the context of marriage, it signifies that a toxic and harmful person can turn a once-loving partnership into a miserable experience.
    7. Marriage often serves as a mirror, reflecting the true nature of the individuals involved. It is a union that reveals the strengths, weaknesses, and character of both partners. Therefore, to create a great home and foster a successful marriage, it is essential to focus on personal growth and becoming the best version of oneself rather than solely seeking the perfect partner.

    https://worldchangersnetwork.org/category/love-relationship/

  • What Love Experts Don’t Tell You

    DECIDING TO MAKE IT WORK IS ALL YOU NEED

    In order to guarantee a blissful relationship, one must make a conscious decision to pursue it. This decision is not to be taken lightly, as it holds the power to transform the dynamics of a marriage. When we grasp the simplicity of this statement, we can find true rest within our relationships.

    Struggling with the truth of marriage will only lead to further disconnection and fragmentation. We are all just a moment of decision away from the life we truly desire. It is crucial to decide what we truly want: holding onto our egos, the need to always be right, and the pursuit of perfection, or embracing the path of bliss.

    Figuratively, many marriages resemble a picture where couples walk in different directions within their hearts, separated by an invisible wall. This image conveys messages of ego, lack of agreement, stubbornness, and a poor understanding of the essence of marriage.

    This pattern will persist until one person decides to break it. It often takes just one individual who comprehends the true meaning of marriage to initiate positive change. There are those who, when faced with their spouse’s shortcomings, choose to retreat to their own tents. Ego, self-righteousness, self-exaltation, and hardness of heart have all contributed to the absence of bliss in many homes.

    Using the picture as an analogy, one person must wholeheartedly decide to do everything in their power to make the marriage work. It is important to remember that any good thing in life comes with a price. Just as a verdant field must be nurtured, freedom and bliss in marriage require a sense of responsibility.

    Rather than waiting for your spouse to come crawling back, take the initiative to meet them and resolve issues. Even when your partner has squandered everything, like the prodigal son, maintain a watchful eye and be ready to embrace them with open arms. Remember, as a Christian, this is the only valid path to a blissful marriage. To argue against it is to settle for the old, unsatisfying experiences.

    When you resolutely determine to make your marriage work, it will. With unwavering commitment, you can let go of your ego and create harmony within the relationship. While you may have initially believed your spouse to be the cause of all the problems, your response can either heal or worsen the situation. Don’t stay perched on your high horse, but instead, humble yourself and work towards reconciliation. Recall that Jesus came down to earth to save us, and he did everything possible to redeem the sinner.

    Do your utmost to support and help your spouse. Once you have done your part, divine power will step in and grant you the bliss you seek. Bliss in marriage is a crown reserved for those who are willing to sacrifice and pay the price. It is the reward for turning the mess within your spouse into a message of love and understanding.

    Discard the advice of relationship experts who speak without true knowledge and experience. Listen to those who have walked the path before and can say, “We have handled and tasted these things.” Follow the wisdom of those who have paved the way.

    If this message seems difficult to comprehend, save it and revisit it until its meaning becomes clear. It holds the secret to unlocking the bliss within your marriage.

  • What Love Experts Don’t Tell You

    GUARANTEE FOR A BLISSFUL RELATIONSHIP

    Let’s discuss the following topic: “What is the guarantee for a blissful relationship?”

    When it comes to guaranteeing a blissful marriage, nothing external can provide an absolute assurance:

    Money,
    Food,
    Comfort,
    Wealth,
    Fame.

    Even those who possess material wealth, abundant food, or widespread fame can face marital challenges and difficulties. Despite their seemingly perfect lives, many individuals with tremendous wealth or fame have experienced the breakdown of their homes.

    As humans, no matter how cautious, guarded, or guided we are, there will come a point where trust, communication, respect, forgiveness, and other important aspects of a relationship might falter.

    If we build our idea of marital bliss solely on these foundations, we are setting ourselves up for significant troubles in the future. The devil will subtly alter our expectations and standards for bliss, causing strain and discord.

    Some marriages may appear stable until one person breaches the trust that was previously established. Conversely, some couples have successfully overcome trust issues in the past.

    We must remember that marriage is a union between two imperfect individuals. Knowing our imperfections, why do we place our expectations of bliss on the fickleness of our own perfection? This is not advocating for a path of complacency or mediocrity but intended to help preserve and strengthen marriages.

    When we hold high expectations for our spouses, we may encounter surprises and disappointments. It is an illusion to believe that external factors or someone else can provide us with enduring bliss. Many marriages face problems when such expectations, particularly related to money or wealth, are not met by the partner.

    It is crucial to adopt the mindset that true bliss begins with accepting and appreciating what we have, making a conscious decision to live with it, and making the best of our circumstances. The journey to marital bliss has been mistakenly portrayed as requiring equal participation from both partners. This flawed concept of marital bliss is why many couples find themselves in irredeemable quagmires.

    In reality, a blissful marriage can start with one person, with the flow gradually catching up to the other. If we wait for our partners to match our level of perfection or meet our every expectation, we will inevitably be disappointed and may lose the vibrancy and color in our marriage.

    According to the biblical perspective on marriage:

    Marriage is intended for two individuals to watch out for and support each other, as mentioned in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12:

    “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up. Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

    When one person falls, the other lifts them up. Knowing that we have a supportive partner is the pathway to bliss. However, it becomes problematic when a person’s bliss depends solely on their partner’s set standards. When these standards are compromised, the love between them also diminishes.

    True love acts as a North Star—unchanging despite circumstances and unaffected by the philosophies of the world. When our love becomes a constant guiding force, like a North Star, we enter into a state of bliss.

    Here’s another perspective:

    In a marriage, two individuals can experience different levels of bliss. While one person may be content and joyful, the other may be facing challenges and hardships. Each person resides in their own world, even within the context of marriage.

    This is why it is essential not to gauge our marital bliss solely on our spouse’s count

  • The Circumstance Doesn’t Define Your Relationship

    Relationship 101

    Topic: The Circumstance Doesn’t Define Your Relationship

    Relationships are a crucial part of our lives and they play a significant role in shaping who we are. It is often said that circumstances do not make a person; instead, they reveal what kind of person we are. In most cases, we cannot change or alter the lifestyle of our partners to a large degree. However, who we are as individuals will determine whether we can cope with our partners or not.

    It is essential to note that successful relationships require resilience, patience, and commitment. It is not uncommon to encounter challenges in relationships. For instance, financial difficulties, infidelity, violence, among others, can put a strain on any relationship. However, how we handle these challenges will reveal who we are as individuals.

    One thing we can learn from successful relationships is that adversity can bring out the best in us. When we face challenges, we have the opportunity to demonstrate humility, temperance, love, and submission to our partners. Adversity in relationships can refine us and make us better versions of ourselves. Those who have gone through more challenges in their relationships often remain standing, while others crumble at the slightest hint of discomfort.

    It is crucial to keep our hearts guarded in relationships, as the Bible says, for from it come the issues of life. When we feel overwhelmed and feel like we cannot take it anymore, it is vital to lean on biblical injunctions and the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Breaking rank with our partners should only be considered as a last resort.

    It is worth noting that not all relationships will work out. However, as individuals, we can choose to exhibit virtues such as resilience, patience, and commitment, knowing that the Holy Spirit dwells in us. When we do our best in relationships, we can be confident that we have done everything in a way that God, angels, and humans would say we have done our best.

    In conclusion, our circumstances, whether of money, fame, wealth, or relationships, do not define us. We have the power to choose who we want to be, and we can turn out to be good or bad, depending on our choices. Successful relationships require commitment, resilience, patience, and a willingness to face challenges head-on. When we exhibit these virtues, we can build strong and lasting relationships that will shape us positively.

    WALE ADEWUMI

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  • Conflict and Effect on Children

    For the Sake of the Children

    Once upon a time, there was a family that lived in a beautiful house in a peaceful neighborhood. They had a loving marriage, two children, and everything seemed perfect. However, things started to change when the parents began having conflicts and arguments.

    At first, the arguments were just small disagreements that the children didn’t pay much attention to. But over time, the language used in these arguments became more hurtful and careless. The parents started saying mean things to each other and even began talking badly about each other in front of their children.

    The children were confused and scared. They didn’t know how to react to their parents’ behavior. They felt like they were walking on eggshells around their own home. They started to feel like they were caught in the middle of their parents’ conflicts, and it was affecting their emotional well-being.

    One day, the parents had a particularly intense argument. The children were in the other room, but they could hear everything. The parents were shouting and saying hurtful things to each other. The children felt like they were in a war zone, and they didn’t know what to do.

    After the argument was over, the children felt even more scared and confused. They didn’t know how to process their emotions, and they didn’t know how to talk to their parents about what had happened. They started to feel like they couldn’t trust their parents anymore.

    Over time, the children started to develop negative attitudes towards their parents. They began to see their parents as angry and hurtful people who couldn’t control their emotions. They also started to pick up on the negative language used by their parents and started using it themselves.

    As the children grew up, they began to have their own relationships. However, because of the negative example set by their parents, they struggled to maintain healthy relationships. They had a hard time expressing themselves in a positive way and often resorted to hurtful language.

    Eventually, the children got divorced just like their parents did. They realized that they had learned their negative behavior and language from their parents and that it had affected every aspect of their lives. They wished their parents had been more careful with their language and behavior, and that they had shielded them from their conflicts.

    In the end, the children realized that their parents’ careless language had set them on a path of destruction. They wished they had been shielded from the negative drama between their parents and that their parents had been more mindful of the impact their language had on their children.